Is It Time To Give Up On Your Marriage?

I hear it so often from people in what they consider to be a bad marriage…”when do I quit, when do I stop beating my head against the wall and accept that it is over?”

It is a question I ask my self on many occasions during my marriage. I had made a commitment; I was to stay for “better or worse.” I felt it my obligation to do whatever I could to not break the vows I had made. So obligated that I was giving up who I was and becoming someone I didn’t like.

So, when people ask me, “when is it time to quit” I tell them if the person they are becoming is someone they don’t like, they need to get out of the marriage. If you are in a marriage that requires you to:

• Put aside goals you have set for yourself.

• Isolates you from friends and family.

• Limits what you are allowed to do for entertainment.

• Change your belief system.

• Constantly nag to get what you want and need.

• Make excuses for your spouse’s behavior.

• Feel as if you have to walk on eggshells.

• Live in fear of abuse.

• Let go of who you are as an individual.

• Worry constantly over the problems in the marriage.

• Question yourself over and over again about why you are still there.

It is time to give up if you find yourself consumed with worry over the problems in your marriage even though you have done all you know you can do to try and solve those problems. When the problems in your marriage consume most of your energy, you are wasting energy and should...read more