1. People & Relationships
Cathy Meyer

Divorce Tip: Stop Trying to “Get Over It.”

By December 2, 2012

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I spoke with a woman the other day; she had been divorced for five years. She has not started dating again, has no social life to speak of and still talks incessantly about her marriage, divorce and ex.

When I asked why she had not started dating again, she responded with, "I haven't gotten over my divorce yet." I could picture her, sitting by the fire, cat on her lap waiting to "get over" her divorce.

If you, like my friend are waiting to get over your divorce, I have a suggestion. Why not get on with your life instead. Stop focusing on the pain and a time in the future when there will be no more pain, get up, get out and start living again.

With any luck you've learned a lot about yourself through the process of divorce. Take what you've learned and begin to rebuild your life. I promise you, the distraction of living fully and completely day-to-day will go a long way in helping you "get over" the divorce.

Comments
December 4, 2012 at 10:37 pm
(1) anonymous says:

sometimes the things you learn about yourself are not positive things. Sometimes you learn that you don’t make good choices in men, that you can’t expect friends to understand your situation, that you have invested most of your life into a relationship that wasn’t what you thought it was.

December 10, 2012 at 2:15 pm
(2) AL Anonymous says:

Wonderful advice! No friends may not totally understand your situation or what you’ve been through but true friends will listen and support you. Staying active physically, mentally and living your life is the best way to get over it. The pain is numbing at the beginning, but getting out and reconnecting with friends, meeting new friends and just learning what you enjoy is the the best way to move forward. I know, I’ve been doing it for the past 8 months since my divorce was final. And I’m truly starting to enjoy my life again. Stll have some sad times and sad days but I’m learning who I am, the good the bad and the ugly and starting to enjoy life again! Good luck to anyone that is going through or has been through the divorce. Life really does get better!

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