From the article: Surviving Your Spouse's Midlife Crisis
When a husband or wife goes into a midlife crisis and seems hell bent on destroying their marriage and family the pain and emotional destruction are great. The only person who doesn't seem to be touched by the fall-out is the one suffering the midlife crisis. Were you a victim of your spouse's midlife crisis? If so, share with our readers tips that helped you move past the pain and destruction and onto healing and a new life. Share What Worked For You
Don't let them drag you into the pit.
- Midlife crisis/depression is like a roller coaster. They are on it 24/7 -- you ARE NOT to join them. Stay on the ground with your kids and watch. When he's low, just try to support as best you can, but stay in your box of consistency and confidence. Very hard to do, but keep journals and pray. When he's on a high -- that's your time to stuff his holes with positives -- because he's like a person who is leaking. When he's up -- stuff him with positives. When he's down, be there, but don't allow him to drag you into the pit. You'll know when you've had enough.
- —Guest Valerie
Step back and breath
- During my wife's ongoing midlife crisis, I went to al-anon, which is a group for friends and family of alcoholics. They told me not to do anything off-the-cuff, that I needed to step back and remove myself from my wife (so to speak) for 6 months, until I am able to calmly make a decision. They also taught me the three C's that get me through every day - I didn't Cause it, I can't Control it, and I can't Cure it.
- —Guest Jon
this works
- realize this is not your loving caring spoce but a selfish seltcentered brat who is mentally ill LOVE them anyway and when they relize hamburger is never as good as steak maybe you will be there maybe not remember you can always trade up it's always there loss
- —Guest chris
what to do
- well, i did 2 things that helped. first i started going to a divorce care support group at church. these people are great. they have all been through it and know exactly how you are feeling and what you are coping with. the second things i did was to see a phyciatrist. she has helped me to put a face on the "why". that was where i was having most of my problem was why did he do this to us. she made me see that his leaving had very little to do with us (me & kids) that he is a "taker" not a giver. and it is all about him. My self-esteem has taken a major beating in this. married for 20 years and all of a sudden he has a gf and wants a divorce,. doen't care about the kids or me. told me that. so i will give him his divorce and go on with life. i still have major anger issues but i am working on that. men are basically dogs. get used to it.
- —Guest sharon
mrs
- my husband is cheating dont know what to do. i need some advise please, get sms. he send sms as well
- —Guest rennie
